Thursday, June 04, 2009

I am going to be a great aunt!

And by great I don't mean awesome, that is obvious! ;)

My nephew Nathan and his wife Kristin surprised us on Monday with the wonderful news of the new baby that will be joining our family in February!

I am over the moon with excitement. I loooooove new babies in our family! I am so proud of my nephew and his new wife. I have never seen a young man so in love with his wife and so ready to be a daddy. He wanted children as soon as God would bless them upon his new family and it happened! They were married a little over a month ago.

My other nephew, Ivan (Nathan's twin) and Desiree are getting married next month and I am pretty sure more babies will shortly follow!

Our Cause

Diabetes.
  • Something that I never really paid attention to or cared that much about until I met my husband.

  • I was drop-kicked hard and fast into a life of learning all about this cruel but manageable disease when my baby was diagnosed.

I am requesting prayers for what doors this disease has and will continue to open for us.

We are always drawn to volunteer work in this area but my heart is really leading me to do more. We do the JDRF walk every year, we help JDRF when and where we can, we have mentored families with newly diagnosed children, and we are volunteering for the Tee Up to Cure Diabetes Golf Tournament on the 13th.

I want to do more. I want to be strong enough to become an ambassador family for JDRF. I want to be able to stand in front of congress and fight for juvenile diabetes research funding to not be cut, to do whatever needs to be done. I want to be an example for my son and fight for a cause with all you have inside you. Right now what is holding me back is knowing that I can still not tell my story to others without crying. I cannot explain how I still wake in the middle of the night and run into my child's room and shake him into startle because I am afraid he has died in his sleep. I cannot talk about how sad it makes me that my child has to deal with the in's and out's of this disease every day of his life. They tell me that crying is okay, it shows that we are human and how drastically it has affected our family, but that is hard for me to do. Pray for our family as we are led to what we are suppose to be doing. We are all here for a purpose. We all have a story to tell and this is a big part of ours.

Saturday we will spend the morning at the JDRF kick-off meeting for the 2009 Walk at Cliff's Amusement park. We get to meet other families in our shoes, hear stories of hope and get motivated to do our part in finding a cure. The afternoon is filled with rides and fun! Trey says that our yearly JDRF Cliff's trip is an awesome benefit of having diabetes. That is my son, that positive one!

Happy 7th birthday to Devyn

Happy Happy Birthday to my sweet Heavenly Devyn Leigh! Seven years ago you joined our family and on our anniversary we were able to bring you home from the hospital. We could not have asked for a better gift or celebration!

How do I put into words how blessed we are to have you as our daughter? You are such a joy to all that know and love you. Your sweetness radiates as much as your beautiful red hair and hazel-green eyes.

I remember the day you were born like it was yesterday. They brought you back from the nursery while I was recovering from surgery and that was when we first got a glimpse of that beautiful red hair. The nurses said you had a temper to match your hair. We thought we had some wild years ahead of us! Not the Baughman temper, Please! You have proven to be the exact opposite. You are such a mellow and even tempered child. You are loving and kind. You are gentle and sweet. You love your baby sister even when she pulls your hair. You share with your brother even after he picks on you. You do amazing in school and your teachers all adore you. You keep your room clean without mom and dad having to ask you. You are an easy good spirited child. You are quiet and shy with strangers and it takes a while for you to let people in, but once you do you love them wholeheartedly and your personality sparkles. You are sensitive and your feelings get hurt very easily but I think that is what makes you the sweet girl that you are. In so many ways you are exactly the same as I was as a child.

You love to go shopping with mom and love when we can sit down together and work on our scrapbooks together. We love to turn on Hannah Montana, Taylor Swift and P!nk and dance in the living room for hours. You prefer a trip to the salon to get a mani/pedi with me over a trip to the toy store. Just yesterday you saw a new nail place "that we just have to try!". You are my beautiful girly girl. I look forward to years of love and friendship as you grow up into a beautiful adult.

People always ask where your red hair came from. Even though you hear it everywhere you go you are still kind and say "I am not too sure." You are told how beautiful you are every time we are out and yet you are gracious every time someone tells you. If only they could all know the beauty that lies beneath the ivory skin, freckles and red hair. It far exceeds what could ever be seen on the outside.

You are such a wonderful example for your baby sister and I am so happy she will have you to grow up with and look up too. What better example could she ever have? You are both so lucky to have a sister and I pray that you two have a bond that will never be broken. When she is sad she calls for her sissy and bro-bro. She wants to be a part of whatever you are doing at all times. What a lucky little girl she is to have you. You and Trey fight. A lot. I feel your pain baby - I was the little sister too! I know that in time, like me, you will grow up to love and adore your big brother. You will look back on these years together and laugh just like your Uncle Ryan and I do all the time. You will be so happy that you have a big brother that loves you unconditionally and would lay down his life for yours (even if it doesn't seem like it now, he would). He is such a great example of strength, hope and goodness and one day you will be so proud to call him your big brother. The greatest gift I will ever give you is your siblings.

Tonight we will head to Bath & Body Works at your request and pick out a few fun girly things, ride the Carousel, and enjoy a night out with our family. Enjoy your special day sweet girl. I love you to the moon and back, more than there are stars in the sky, more than I love ice cream and pumpkin pie.

Love,
Mama

10 Favorite Things

Haha - Crystal - I found this in my drafts. I never finished it! Whoops!



10 Things

Crystal posted about 10 of her favorite things starting with the letter J. I have been told I need to post more so I will do one too. My assigned letter is N.

1. Natasha - duh. She is one of my BFF's and I love her.

2. New Clothes - they make me feel sassy.

3. Nails - I feel pretty when I have my nails done. My toes must be painted, preferably red or pink.

4. Newborns - every newborn I hold sends me into a frenzy of baby fever. I love everything about them - the smell, the little squeaks, the tiny toes. LOVE THEM

5. New Castle - New Caste is a beer with memories for me. It was a happy hour special that a friend and I shared a lot of. We hated it, but drank it because it was cheap. It grew on us both.

(Dude, N is hard!)

6. No Use for A Name - A band I enjoy and have a lot of good memories associated with.

7. NYC - I am drawn there. I absolutely love it there and dream of moving there someday when my kids are grown.

8. New Scrapbooking Supplies - I am an addict. I admit it. I buy stuff and sometimes it isn't used for years. I am okay with that, it's not like it expires. :)

9. Neighbors - I love having good neighbors that I can sit and watch our kids play together with. Even better if they like mojitos. ;) I love me some Jess!

10. Night time - I love when my babies are all cozy in bed and I can enjoy some quiet time by reading a book, picking up the house, or watching a movie.

If you want to do your very own list, I will gladly give you a letter!

Monday, March 09, 2009

It has been a while (as always)

Life has been busy and I just never seem to get enough time to get on here and post. When I do have the time I can't decide what I want to talk about. Blogging use to come so easy to me and I have thousands of Live Journal posts to prove it! These days it just doesn't and I can't quite figure out why. Any who.

Last week was AWFUL at work. I left one meeting crying like a pre-menstrual mess and then proceeded to get my leg smashed in my friend's car door at lunch when I was getting in and the wind slammed it shut on me. I have a bruise on my calf the size of my fist. I honestly thought it broke my leg. I just sat there thinking, "you have GOT to be kidding me. Really??" Ang, Eric and I promptly went and had a beer at lunch and they let me sit there and whine about my no good day. Good friends, I tell you. The crying episode is a long story but I personally blame it on me being sick and the fact that it was 2pm and I had still not had lunch yet. This morning I came in to a beautiful purple African Violet plant. It made me smile and think this week should be better. It will, right??

**wrong** I typed the 1st half of this entry this morning and since then, fell down......walking. Yep, you read that right. I was just walking down the hall and then all the sudden I felt everything go in slow motion as I was saying "Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo." I hit the floor and landed square on my knees right in front of the guards station. After I told my lunch buddies Ang and Eric, they ran to the guards to see if they caught it on the surveillance tapes. They didn't, they had already checked. Thank God. We all got a great laugh out of it and my new nickname is Grace. I think it fits well. My life is summed up by a series of embarrassing moments. I have accepted it.

Dante and I leave for NYC in a week. I am uber excited for this trip. For once, a trip to some where awesome where I am not working while I am there! Dante will be in meeting during the days and I just plan on perusing the City all day. It is a dream. We are staying at the Hilton that's in the WTC/Financial District. I got tickets to see Late Night with my lover, Jimmy Fallon on St. Patty's Day. When I am there I am going to run on stage, hump his leg and ask him if I can have his babies. Record it friends. It will be good TV. ;) I am praying I get picked for "Lick it for 10". I dream big people.

On the 18th we are going to see one of Dante's distant relatives play the Bandoneon at a local Pub. He is in a group called Eternal Tango. We met him a few years ago and would love to see him again while we are out there.

Other that that we have no set plans. We really want to visit St. Patrick's Cathedral, Ellis Island, Ground Zero, spend some time in Central Park and do all the other touristy things.

This is a picture from the hotel we are staying in.


I actually had a dream about being in a hotel room with this view last night. It was fabulous. More to come later. I need to get some work done before the day's over.

Wednesday, January 07, 2009

Girl Scout Cookie Sales

Tonight we have a meeting for Girl Scout cookie sales. I am not even going to lie, I am dreading this part. I am praying we aren't in a sale-crazed group. Scenes from Troop Beverly Hills are flashing though my mind and freaking me out. Nattie has told me that Bekah's group is way laid back with sales so I am hoping we are as lucky.

I sent out an email out work and I am sure we get most of her sales that way so hopefully it wont be too bad.

Friday, January 02, 2009

grrrrrrrr

Blogger is not saving any of my formatting and it is making me cranky.

Mellow Friday

While everyone was sound asleep this morning I drug myself out of bed and headed to work. Dante took the day off and the kids don't go back to school until Tuesday. Hardly anyone is here today so it has been nice and mellow. My co-worker and I just went and picked a yummy Carne Adovada burrito from Golden Pride and I am in the process of trying to clean my office while it is nice and quiet.


New Year's was nice. We had a fondue party over at Ryan and Lucia's, played some games and spent the night over there. Even though I wasn't drinking, I was nervous about getting on the roads with all the drunks. We were off yesterday and I was so lazy. We laid around, watched movies, played games and read all day. I have been reading Little House on the Prairie to Devyn and Old Yeller to Trey. I also spent some time creating last night. I did 14 layouts. Go me.

Before I forget: I have quite a few scrappers that read my blog so I am going to share some of my favorites sites:


A Page 4 All Seasons sells layouts that are all precut, have a instruction sheet and all the embellishments you can have 2 pages done in 15 mintes and they are simply amazing. I am totally addicted. It you follow their blog they often run great specials. The site is ran by some very sweet ladies. They also have some great monthly autoships that I am dying to start getting. This was one of the 1st layouts I bought and loved. Click HERE
















I have been getting the monthly Housecall kits from Heartstring Designs. They are still my favorite for monthly orders. They always come with tons of supplies that you have left long after all your pages are done. Click HERE for the site. You can see this months kit up there now. I think these are the best for your money. They also have a Greeting Card kit you can get seperate or combine for a discount. Both are great!


Here are a couple layouts I love from one of last springs kits:









































I love eyelets. Almost as much as I love flowers. :D You have to go to Eyelet Outlet & Brads for cheap eyelets. They have great deals: Click HERE

Please, if you have some favorite sites, share with me!

Dammit. All this talk is making me want to leave work and go home and scrap all night. :)

Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Audrey funnies

I absolutely love age 2. Their personality really starts to shine and they say the most hilarious things. Audrey is so animated and she has the most expressive little face.

  • We were in the car driving home the other night and Audrey was upset at me for something (probably not getting her way) and she tells me with her eyebrows scrunched up, "I don't care. I don't 'preciate it! You not my best buddy any more!" As obnoxious and rude as it was, I totally laughed on the inside and scolded her on the outside. I don't appreciate it???? Really?? Where does that come from?! LOL

  • I call her "my darling angel" all the time. The other day I called her my precious angel. Se looked at me all hurt and said, "Ugh, I'm your darling angel mom."Usually she calls her baby doll her little sister. A little later she was in the living room looking for her baby doll and yelling, "Hey, hey, anyone know where my darling angel is?????"

  • Her other favorite thing to do is yell, "Yoooooou ready guys?!?!" When someone answers yes she yells, "Okay, dun, dun, duuuuuuuuuuuuuun!!" and jumps. For a 2 year-old this is apparently very entertaining and can be repeated over and over. It doesn't matter if you are at the grocery store or in church. ;)

There are countless other things she says or does on a daily basis but I can't think of them right now. She bring such joy and fun to our home. What a great kid.

I love writing down the kid funnies. I have so many from Trey and Devyn in my Live Journal. Every now and then the kids beg me to log on and read them. We laugh and they adamantly argue that the never said or did such things.

Sarah darlin!

I am definately going to be in Omaha at the end of April. We need to start making plans!!!!! YAY!

I can not wait. I thought I'd never get a chance to make it out there to see you!

**happy dance**

Potty training continues

Audrey is doing really well. She has only had 1 accident at home so far and that was this morning when she was still half asleep. She has had a couple in daycare. I think Leona my not be taking her to try as much as I am able to at home. Her hands are full, especially with her kids being out of school. I am taking her every 30 minutes or so until she gets the hang of it.

We went and bought Audrey Princess and My Little Pony panties and she has big opinions on which ones she wears every morning. She prefers Pooh, then Dora, and after that it doesn't really matter. :)

I am thinking we will have days down in a couple weeks and then we can start on nights. She is such a smart little gal. She is picking it up pretty quickly.

This morning she said, "Mom, I do NOT like to pee in my pants. That is gwoss!"

You look tired today

"You look tired today". That is a nice way of saying you look like crap I think, right??

I got up early this morning and actually took time putting on my make-up and curling my hair, which I rarely do anymore. With 3 little kids, sleep is more valued than looking pretty. Just sayin'. So imagine my disgust when someone walks into my office this morning and says, "You look really tired today, are you okay??" Ugh. And here I thought I looked hot today, lol. Snap. It may have to do with the fact that I was up til 5am on Friday night and 2 am on Saturday night. My body is still trying to get re-adjusted. I am just too old to have the wild and crazy nights like I use too. :D

We had a great Christmas. It was the normal holidays. We went to my mother-in-laws the Saturday before, Adam's sister's house for Chirstmas Eve, my brother and Lucia's for Christmas day, and my father-in-law's for the Saturday after. It was really busy, but nice. Friday night my cousins Micah, Daniele and her hubby, Jeremy, came into town (hence the late nights). We had a "Rock Band" and dance party til 4am the first night with them, my brother, Lucia, and Dani's friend Adam. It was a blast! Good honest and clean fun. Saturday night we went to Crazy Crocs Tavern and then we all realized we were too tired and decided IHOP sounded better than beer.

This week has been dragging. I am so glad we get tomorrow off. I will work Friday and then have 3 more days off. Hopefully I will fully recover by then! Tomorrow night is girl's night out. Nothing crazy, I promise. My wild nights usually consist of getting a double shot latte and then not being able to go to bed until 1am because I'm too hyped up on caffiene. That is how we roll friends. You can't tame these girls. ;) I am very excited to get some time to hang out with my new friend, Brynn (hi Brynn, if you are reading!). I met her through our Krafty Ladies Group and she lives just down the street. We hit it off really well and the kids had a blast playing with her 3 little ones. I am always down for a new scrapbooking buddy as long as Texas doesn't try and steal her like it did Crystal and Jess! :( Good girlfriends are really hard to come by and she seems like such a sweet girl. :) She even offered to take my kids while we recovered on Saturday, lol. What a sweetheart. Noami is coming to GNO also and we haven't gotten to hang out much lately, so yay!

Right now I am sitting here listening to Etta James and Otis Redding trying to get motivated to get some things done. My desk is a mess, I have some slides I need to complete for a meeting I am presenting at in Atlanta, I have a drug inventory to complete, some filing to code and absolutely no motivation to get it done. I am living in the land of manana today. My brain is still in vacation mode.

Sunday, December 28, 2008

Potty Training day 1

Audrey got some Dora and Pooh panties for Christmas so we decided today was the day to start trying to potty train her. She has been out of diapers all day, except for nap time and has not had a single accident. :D Trey was almost 3 before he was potty trained and with Devyn we didn't even try until she was 2 1/2 or so. Audrey just turned 2 but she has been really interested in it so we decided to give it a whirl. She is such a bright little thing! :)

Now we just need to break her of the binky at bedtime! LOL

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

I was off yesterday and so were the kiddos. I took a bath and when I came out of the bathroom I found a note on the bed that said "ring this for food, drinks and more" and a big bell. I heard the kids scheming outside in my room but I of course thought they were planning something to get themselves in trouble with. LOL. They are so sweet.

Work has been so busy

It looks like I am coming up on some busy travel in the next 2 months. I am dreading it.

I will be in:

-Santa Fe for a Strategic Planning Conference January 13-16. I love this trip. We stay at La Posada which is close to Heaven in my book. Dante and the kids usually come up on the last night and we hang out in Santa Fe the next day.

-Atlanta for an end of study training meeting January 28-30 that I am presenting at. **yikes**

-San Diego for a study kick-off meeting February 9-11.

I hate the busy travel time of the year. I miss my family like crazy and I feel bad that Dante has to do it all while I am gone.

I won't lie though, the no diapers, a full night's sleep, long peaceful showers, reading a book uninterrupted....all of that is pretty nice. When I first got this job I traveled a lot - usually 5-8 times a year. It has really mellowed out lately which has been nice. When Maria worked here, I loved to travel because us girls know how to have FUN. But now I travel either alone or with Rob and it just is not the same. LOL

My God of the Eleventh hour

Mass on Sunday really spoke to my heart. Father Whorton's homily was about our God of the 11th hour. How in so many times in our life it seems like God has left you alone in your sorrow or desperation, but in the end He is always there when you need Him the most. He told a story about how his sister had only had c-sections and was pregnant again. She prayed that God would allow her to have a child naturally even though all the doctors had told her no, a c-section was the only way to go. Ring a bell? **ding, ding ding** And in the end, she was in the operating room about to go into surgery and the baby came on it's own. That was God's intervention answering her prayers.

This was my story. I felt like this message was God's way of saying, "Yes Brandi, I see you there in the 4th pew back and I am so glad you could join us today!" LOL

I always felt like I had been cheated out of the experience of a natural childbirth that I had so desperately wanted. I went to my OB and asked him to please let me try when I found out I was pregnant with my third child. He consulted with the board and they declined my request. A c-section was scheduled for a Monday morning and I had no choice. I had been put on bed rest at 32 weeks and at 38 weeks, on a Friday night, I was sitting on the couch and as I leaned back to stretch my back, my water broke. I took my time showering, shaving my legs and getting pretty before heading to the hospital. I am a bit prissy like that. ;) I was not having many contractions and my labor with Trey was so incredibly long I figured why not?? Well, as Dante was wigging out, I decided to not blow my hair dry and get going. By the time we got to the hospital my contractions were so intense I thought I was going to have my baby in the lobby. ;) I got triaged and they let me hang out for a while. Since I was progressing so fast they were trying to get an O.R. ready for me but kept having emergency c-sections bump my spot. So finally a room was ready and they took me back. I was still drug free and pretty panic-stricken. They checked me before getting started and the doctor said, "Um, I think we are going to have a baby right now the good old fashioned way!" Little 5lb 15oz Audrey Genevieve came screaming into the world minutes later. My active labor was all of 20 minutes long. It was what I had prayed for and it was empowering and beautiful. It was intense because I was so unprepared mentally for a drug-free birth, but I would not change any of it.

It is interesting because I struggle with going to mass every single week but when I get there I feel so happy that I decided to go. I will admit, we have not been in over a month. We had been really good about going every Sunday but this is all still very new to us. We were married for over 7 years before we decided we needed to be raising our family in the Church. But now, every time I walk through the doors of our parish I feel at home. When I got down on my knees I teared up and thanked God for bringing me back. I pray for forgiveness for the choices in my life I make that aren't always the best. I always pray that He holds me tight and doesn't let me slip away. It sounds cliche', I know, but I do get a very overwhelming emotional feeling every time I am there (unless we end up in the cry room, haha).

Dante and I went through Alpha classes the first half of 2008 and start RCIA in January. On Easter I will be baptized and confirmed in the the Catholic church. It has been a beautiful journey and I am very blessed with the Alpha friends I have made along the way.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

Pics O' Pie

The sweet face I love



















Mom and Audrey's work of art on Tuesday



















The look I get when she is annoyed with me. Sassy!










Audrey is 2!

Audrey is such a funny kid. Her personality is bright and sassy. I love it.

A few of her recent funnies I don't want to forget:

-Everyday she tells me "My Mommy, I lub you weally bad!" or "My Mommy, I want you, weally weally bad."

Really bad. I love it

-Last week she was yelling at me from downstairs. I headed down and she yells up the stairs, "Mom! Are you naked??" LOL, um, no kid, fully dressed thanks!

-She at random told Leona the other day, "Mrs. Ona, my mom takes baths....and poops."

-Everything is blue. You ask her which one she wants (in regards to anything) and her answer is "da boo one".

-We were in the line at the store on Monday and she tells me, "Mommy, mommy, 'ook, Obama, on da book!!" Sure enough there was a People magazine with him on the cover. Seriously. She JUST turned 2 and she knows who Obama is??? What the?!

- If she gets mad she tells you in a stern voice, Goo'bye!" and stomps out of the room and closes the door.

- Every thing is Dora in her world right now. She wanted a Dora birthday party, she has a Dora toddler bed, chair, toy box, clock, chair, etc. in her room and is very proud of it all.

- If I show her something she likes her response is, "Ahhhhh, nice." LOL. I showed her a picture I took of her on the camera and she tells me, "Ahhhh, nice."

- We hear "I no wanna _______" a lot. A LOT. "I no WANNA night, night!" I no wanna Mrs. Ona's house!" the list goes on and on. She is very "two".

- She is in a big girl bed now and loooves the freedom. She gets up and plays but the moment you open her door she books it to her bed, dives in and pretends to be asleep. She will be in her room for 5 minutes and will yell out the door, "Mom!!!! I wake up!!!!!"

- She loves the song "Let it Be" by the Beatles. She sings at the top of her lungs in the car, over and over and over..... "Yet it be!!!Yet it be!!!!!!"

- Her favorite book is The Going to Bed Book by Sandra Boynton. She knows every word to it. We read it every night and I say the first word on the page and she finishes the sentence (yelling every line, I mind you).

- If I don't answer her right away she will call me by my first name. "Mom, mom, mom, BRANDI!!!!!" Every day when I pick her up from Leona's I knock on the door and I hear her inside yelling, "MY BRANDI IS HERE!!!!!!!!!!!"

She is such a cool little person.

Monday, October 27, 2008

We are walking for a cure

This Saturday our family and friends will all stand behind my little man and walk together in his honor. I can't even write that with out getting teary eyed. We pray that there is a cure for diabetes in Trey's lifetime. No child should have to endure what he does. We have calculated that in his 8 years of living with diabetes he has endured over 23,000 finger pokes and over 7,300 injections. It breaks my heart that he doesn't squirm and throw a fit when he sees a needle coming at him. He is 9, he should wig out with shots.

I still remember every single detail of the day he was diagnosed. The horror of hearing that my 16 month old baby has a disease that will change all of our lives still makes my hands shake. I still wake up more times then not in a panic that he may have died in his sleep from low blood sugar. It is an awful feeling and I'd give every limb to have that go away.

I try and see the good in everything and as much as this disease sucks, it has made him who he is. He is strong beyond his years. He is compassionate and he will be the first to tell you "it could always be worse". He is the type of person that will make a difference. It has taught our family a lot about life, and for that, I am thankful.

Insulin is not a cure. Support diabetes research.

Please come see mine and Trey's pages and read the comments our friends and family have left Trey.

See how many lives he has touched.
Brandi's:

http://walk.jdrf.org/index.cfm?fuseaction=extranet.personalpage&confirmid=87052346

Trey's:
http://walk.jdrf.org/index.cfm?fuseaction=extranet.personalpage&confirmid=87253752

I love you son and I pray every single night that we will wake up to the news that there is a cure. Keep your eyes up to the stars. You are making a difference in this world. A little bit longer buddy.....

Friday, March 28, 2008

Pictures from our trip to San Antonio to meet Cole!


On the plane to San Antonio. This was Audrey's first ride on a plane (other than the few while she was in my tummy.)





Watching Sesame Street on the iPOD.








Audrey trying to getting a glimpse of Cole.














Cheese!!!!!


Cole in Audrey's old moses basket. Audrey had to try it out too.

Tuckered out girlie.











Kaelyn and Lauren at Chick-fil-a























The ride home. :)

Some picture love


Easter was wonderful. We got up early and the kids played with their gifts from the Easter Bunny. We went to High Mass at 9am. It was beautiful. I love the "bells and smells" of the Solemn Mass. Monsignor Raun was giving mass and he is so inspiring. All the priests are, but he is something special. He teaches quite a few of our Alpha sessions and he is amazing. The kind of teacher that has you hanging on to every word and trying to live by them. After mass we headed to Dante's dad and the kids had an easter egg hunt and then we went to dinner at my parents. It was a busy but very mellow and peaceful day.




My parents are re-landscaping their backyard and Trey is Grandpa's helper. No worries my paranoid friends, my dad operates heavy machinery for a living, he is in good hands here. ;) Growing up, one of my favorite things was working with my dad and getting rides in the bucket of the back hoe. Glad to see my kids feel the same way. ;)











My brother took this picture and Trey told him, "My mother is going to kill grandpa when she see what he let me do!" LOL. Okay, so *I* tend to be the paranoid one. I won't even let my kids ride the horses at my in-laws because *I* am scared of them.







Trey is such a hard worker. He is always eager to help out (especially if it involves tearing stuff up, lol). He tore down all the timbers from that terrace.

I feel a scrapbook page coming on, woohooooooo!

Friday, February 01, 2008

You are so loved by many....

Sweet Tristan, who has made such an imprint on my heart, passed away last Sunday.

Please continue to pray for his mommy and daddy and his 2 big brothers that loved him so dearly.

In a world of uncertainty, they were so blessed to be able to spend 56 beautiful, love-filled days with him. Jesus now has one more sweet little boy in His arms.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Prayer request

Please lift the Summons family up in prayer. They welcomed their sweet baby girl, Mary Grace, into the world yesterday and then said goodbye to her after she went to be in the arms of Jesus.

http://marygracesummons.blogspot.com/

Also please continue to pray for sweet little Tristan. He has made it to day 43 today and every day is another blessing. Please pray for his continued strength and for many more days with his mommy, daddy, and 2 big brothers. His parents are amazing Christians and honestly, every post I read on their blog makes me strive to be better. They may never know this but Tristan has played an enormous role in my dedication to finding religion again.

http://tristanasher.blogspot.com/

I am telling you something. These mother's of these sweet and beautiful T-18 babies are something so special. There is a reason why God chose them to be their mommies. They inspire so many, they are strong and beautiful in their faith and the love they have in their hearts is unwaivering.

Monday, December 17, 2007

Friday, December 14, 2007

Date night with the sweetest guy under 4 foot tall

Once a month the kids get a special date night. This month it is with me and next month it is with dad.

Tonight Trey and I went and finished some Christmas shopping and picked up 2 gifts for birthday parties tomorrow. We had dinner while we were out and they headed to Blades to go ice skating. It was so good to get some much needed one-on-one time with my son. Since Audrey's birth, our time together has been as a family. The time we have had as a family of 5 has been great but we also really needed some time to re-connect individually. Both Trey and Devyn really thrive on special time with Dante and I and it reaps so many rewards for our family. Overall behavior is better and they just seem more happy.

Last Friday night Devyn and I went to dinner, My Little Pony Live, and to Starbucks for hot chocolate after. I didn't tell her what we were doing until we got there. I told her to get dressed up and we were going to have a special night. She was so excited once she figured out where we were. :) She is such a sweet little girl and our night together was very special for both of us.

Here are a few pics from our night out:




I am so sad I forgot the camera tonight when we went skating. :(

Wednesday, December 05, 2007

In following up to Natasha's it is too quiet post.....

This is what happens when Devyn leaves her Halloween candy out and suddenly you realize the baby is way too quiet.


She pulled out the floor pillows, took a seat and opened a box of Spidey Candy Sticks(aka - what us kids of the 80's like to called candy cigarettes). Next in line where the Dots but daddy intervened.
Isn't she cute when she is getting into trouble?!?

Thursday, November 29, 2007

Trey has been dx with ADD

He was placed on Ridalin last night and today marks day 1 of treatment. He will have weekly follow-up for a while with his pediatrician.

And really, if one more person asks me "Are you sure it isn't just him acting like a kid or being a boy??" I am going to kick them in the @#*&*$ teeth. Medicating was a very big decision for us and no, we didn't make it lightly. We are not idiots, yes, we have done our research, any other questions???

I hate the stigma with ADD and the misdiagnosing that has placed such a stigma on the kids that have it. His evaluation ruled out "Bad behavior", defiant disorders, depression, bipolar disorder, and learning disabilities. I feel confident that we are making a decision to help our child's future. I am sorry if "you" do not think he needs to take "one more medication" or have one more "thing wrong with him". I don't love it either but I am pretty hip on him being able to focus in class, follow instructions, do well in school and finally make some friends.

I am too damn emotional over this to deal with people's judgy-ness right now.

/vent.

Sunday, November 25, 2007

My birthday letter from the sweetest son ever

Dear Mom,
Happy Birthday. I hope you have a good day. I love you mom. You are the best. You are fun to play with. You are my best friend. I like you because you care for me.
Love you Mom,
Love Trey

Today is a big milestone. Goodbye 20's, hello 30.

30.

I remember when 30 sounded so old. LOL

I feel proud to be 30. I have accomplished a lot in life already and I can embrace my age. I have a beautiful loving family, a husband that loves me and all my flaws, three of the coolest kids ever, an education, a nice warm home, a good job....really I could not ask for more.

This morning I was served breakfast in bed with 3 noisy kids and it was fabulous. :) I nursed Audrey and we all cuddled and hung out while Dante did the laundry. :) I am still sick as a dog with this head cold and tummy "issues" so laying in bed all day sounds pretty terrific. Trey and Devyn are in the loft making my birthday present which I am pretty sure consists of construction paper, pipe cleaners and some messy paint that I am praying does not end up on the carpet. LOL

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

To Wean or not to Wean

We made it past our 1 year goal!!! Yay us!!!!

I will be honest with you here, I am realllllly tired of pumping at work. I am not however, tired of the whole nursing experience one bit. I love how attached she is to nursing and how it can soothe her instantly when she is upset. I love how she tugs at my shirt when she is fussy.

I have thought about not pumping at work anymore since she can be on cow milk now at my mom's and only nursing at night. The only problem is that she usually sleeps through the night now so with eating dinner that maybe leaves 2 nursing sessions a day and I know my supply, it will be gone in a matter of weeks if I don't keep pumping at work. I just don't know what to do.

I am leaning towards self-weaning, don't offer/don't refuse but I may just give in and keep pumping at work and keep offering it to her.

The decision to wean will be so bittersweet. I am so anxious to be done with pumping but I am not ready to never have a nursing baby again. That makes me incredibly sad.

I feel bad for forgetting

Ang and I were chatting about something today that has been on my mind a lot lately. This is the 2nd year in a row that our angel's anniversary has passed and I didn't realize until a couple weeks later.

We lost a baby November 4th, 2005. I knew it was happening before it did. My HCG levels never got that high and then I started spotting. I was on the way to the hospital to have another blood test done and was in a pretty nasty accident on my way there. I was nailed when a guy ran a red light and my truck was wrapped around a light pole. I remember crying to the fighter pilot who ran to my aide from the AF gate where I was hit "My BABY, noooooooooooooooo!!!!!" I called Crystal and Dante and thank goodness Crystal worked right inside the gate, she came running out and Dante was there shortly after. Dante went to pick up Trey and Devyn and Crystal stayed with me all night. I started bleeding heavy at Urgent Care that night and it was confirmed, our baby was gone. It hit me really hard. We had conceived on my Grandmother's birthday and everything just felt right with the pregnancy. I should not have lost the baby. I was due on the 4th of July and after almost a year of trying we felt so blessed.

A few months later I was pregnant again. Despite bed rest, the pregnancy went as planned and at 38 weeks Mrs. Audrey joined our family on November 4th, 2006 on her own, 2 days before my scheduled c-section. It took me weeks before I realized that she was born on the anniversary of losing our last baby. 2 WEEKS later I realized. I had a baby in my arms and her birth did not go as planned. It was traumatic for me, not in a terrible way, but emotionally traumatic. IT happened the way I prayed it would but it was overwhelming. I was not prepared to go through labor again and I sure as hell was not prepared to push out a baby with no drugs and so quickly. In the whirl whird and euphoria that surrounds having a baby, the day slipped past me.

With that being said, I allowed myself to have let the day go by without acknowledging it, but this year I did it again. I felt so much joy in celebrating a whole year of life with my baby girl that I did not morn our loss on her birthday. I feel like my grief was very short lived but it was real and it was painful when I was going through it. I do feel like my heart healed quickly, sometimes too quickly that I feel guilty. It doesn't mean I have forgotten. Every time I drive through that intersection I tear up and remember every detail - what I was wearing, the desperation I felt, the thankfulness that Crystal was their to support me, all of it I feel simply when driving by the new light pole. My God, it was a horrible day. I feel like Audrey was given to our family on our Angel's day to help us heal, to take away the sadness that tainted that day.

I do feel that our baby's soul came back to us in Audrey. She was not ready to join us the first time around but in the end, she was. That is just my belief....or maybe what I tell myself for comfort. It makes me feel better. When we were trying the first time I had a lady at work who I turn to a lot for spiritual guidance tell me, "Don't worry Brandi, March. March is your time." So imagine how I laughed when I got pg in October and was due in July. Well after the loss and ttc again, we ended up finding out I was pg again in **drum roll please** March. Everything about Audrey's pregnancy and delivery points to higher signs and "coincidences" (I believe there are no coincidences in life) that are undeniable in my book. She is a gift. The funny thing is, when I was pg the first time I really felt that the baby was a boy. We named him Xavier shortly after I miscarried and in my heart I was carrying a boy.

My heart hurts for all my friends that have experienced loss. It is so painful and the heartache, it is miserable. I think of what Ang had to go through, delivering a sleeping baby, and I cry for her. These women that go through this - they are so strong and they have to put on a brave face and keep their family going despite the pain and personal terror they are going through. I will never downplay an early loss because I know first hand, losing a baby at any point in a pregnancy is terribly hard on a person, but I can not imagine going through a loss like Ang did. Hun, I know you are having a hard time with Reese's due date coming up and I just want you to know we love you and we love her. You have made such strides in life even amid great loss and your family's life being turned upside down. You honor your little girl every day with the person you are and the way you live your life.

From the New York Times -

You can make something out of everything.....even Sesame Street I guess.....geez.

By VIRGINIA HEFFERNAN
Published: November 18, 2007

Sunny days! The earliest episodes of “Sesame Street” are available on digital video! Break out some Keebler products, fire up the DVD player and prepare for the exquisite pleasure-pain of top-shelf nostalgia.

Just don’t bring the children. According to an earnest warning on Volumes 1 and 2, “Sesame Street: Old School” is adults-only: “These early ‘Sesame Street’ episodes are intended for grown-ups, and may not suit the needs of today’s preschool child.”

Say what? At a recent all-ages home screening, a hush fell over the room. “What did they do to us?” asked one Gen-X mother of two, finally. The show rolled, and the sweet trauma came flooding back. What they did to us was hard-core. Man, was that scene rough. The masonry on the dingy brownstone at 123 Sesame Street, where the closeted Ernie and Bert shared a dismal basement apartment, was deteriorating. Cookie Monster was on a fast track to diabetes. Oscar’s depression was untreated. Prozacky Elmo didn’t exist.

Nothing in the children’s entertainment of today, candy-colored animation hopped up on computer tricks, can prepare young or old for this frightening glimpse of simpler times. Back then — as on the very first episode, which aired on PBS Nov. 10, 1969 — a pretty, lonely girl like Sally might find herself befriended by an older male stranger who held her hand and took her home. Granted, Gordon just wanted Sally to meet his wife and have some milk and cookies, but . . . well, he could have wanted anything. As it was, he fed her milk and cookies. The milk looks dangerously whole.

Live-action cows also charge the 1969 screen — cows eating common grass, not grain improved with hormones. Cows are milked by plain old farmers, who use their unsanitary hands and fill one bucket at a time. Elsewhere, two brothers risk concussion while whaling on each other with allergenic feather pillows. Overweight layabouts, lacking touch-screen iPods and headphones, jockey for airtime with their deafening transistor radios. And one of those radios plays a late-’60s news report — something about a “senior American official” and “two billion in credit over the next five years” — that conjures a bleak economic climate, with war debt and stagflation in the offing.

The old “Sesame Street” is not for the faint of heart, and certainly not for softies born since 1998, when the chipper “Elmo’s World” started. Anyone who considers bull markets normal, extracurricular activities sacrosanct and New York a tidy, governable place — well, the original “Sesame Street” might hurt your feelings.

I asked Carol-Lynn Parente, the executive producer of “Sesame Street,” how exactly the first episodes were unsuitable for toddlers in 2007. She told me about Alistair Cookie and the parody “Monsterpiece Theater.” Alistair Cookie, played by Cookie Monster, used to appear with a pipe, which he later gobbled. According to Parente, “That modeled the wrong behavior” — smoking, eating pipes — “so we reshot those scenes without the pipe, and then we dropped the parody altogether.”

Which brought Parente to a feature of “Sesame Street” that had not been reconstructed: the chronically mood-disordered Oscar the Grouch. On the first episode, Oscar seems irredeemably miserable — hypersensitive, sarcastic, misanthropic. (Bert, too, is described as grouchy; none of the characters, in fact, is especially sunshiney except maybe Ernie, who also seems slow.) “We might not be able to create a character like Oscar now,” she said.

Snuffleupagus is visible only to Big Bird; since 1985, all the characters can see him, as Big Bird’s old protestations that he was not hallucinating came to seem a little creepy, not to mention somewhat strained. As for Cookie Monster, he can be seen in the old-school episodes in his former inglorious incarnation: a blue, googly-eyed cookievore with a signature gobble (“om nom nom nom”). Originally designed by Jim Henson for use in commercials for General Foods International and Frito-Lay, Cookie Monster was never a righteous figure. His controversial conversion to a more diverse diet wouldn’t come until 2005, and in the early seasons he comes across a Child’s First Addict.

The biggest surprise of the early episodes is the rural — agrarian, even — sequences. Episode 1 spends a stoned time warp in the company of backlighted cows, while they mill around and chew cud. This pastoral scene rolls to an industrial voiceover explaining dairy farms, and the sleepy chords of Joe Raposo’s aimless masterpiece, “Hey Cow, I See You Now.” Chewing the grass so green/Making the milk/Waiting for milking time/Waiting for giving time/Mmmmm.

Oh, what’s that? Right, the trance of early “Sesame Street” and its country-time sequences. In spite of the show’s devotion to its “target child,” the “4-year-old inner-city black youngster” (as The New York Times explained in 1979), the first episodes join kids cavorting in amber waves of grain — black children, mostly, who must be pressed into service as the face of America’s farms uniquely on “Sesame Street.”

In East Harlem and Bedford-Stuyvesant in 1978, 95 percent of households with kids ages 2 to 5 watched “Sesame Street.” The figure was even higher in Washington. Nationwide, though, the number wasn’t much lower, and was largely determined by the whims of the PBS affiliates: 80 percent in houses with young children. The so-called inner city became anywhere that “Sesame Street” played, because the Children’s Television Workshop declared the inner city not a grim sociological reality but a full-color fantasy — an eccentric scene, framed by a box and far removed from real farmland and city streets alike.

The concept of the “inner city” — or “slums,” as The Times bluntly put it in its first review of “Sesame Street” — was therefore transformed into a kind of Xanadu on the show: a bright, no-clouds, clear-air place where people bopped around with monsters and didn’t worry too much about money, cleanliness or projecting false cheer. The Upper West Side, hardly a burned-out ghetto, was said to be the model.

People on “Sesame Street” had limited possibilities and fixed identities, and (the best part) you weren’t expected to change much. The harshness of existence was a given, and no one was proposing that numbers and letters would lead you “out” of your inner city to Elysian suburbs. Instead, “Sesame Street” suggested that learning might merely make our days more bearable, more interesting, funnier. It encouraged us, above all, to be nice to our neighbors and to cultivate the safer pleasures that take the edge off — taking baths, eating cookies, reading. Don’t tell the kids.

Caveat teletor: Volumes 1 and 2 of “Sesame Street: Old School” are available on DVD, which you can sample and buy on Sesameworkshop.org. With a few episodes, extras and celebrity appearances by the likes of Richard Pryor and Lou Rawls, “Old School” sounds harmless enough. But are you ready to mainline this much ’70s nostalgia?

Friday, November 09, 2007

Halloween 2007

These are from Dante's cell phone but I figure I would post them anyways. :)




Parent teacher conferences 2007


Devyn - Kindergarten:

"Your daughter is just precious. No really, she is just a precious, precious person. We love her to pieces." That is what her teacher told me. Of course I know that, I am her mother. But when someone sees in your child what you see as a parent, it is wonderful. She really is a sweet, sweet, kind soul. My God, she is so much like me as a child. She is really quiet and reserved if she is not 100% comfortable with people. She is loving and strives to do well. She is a "people pleaser" as her teacher says. This can be good and bad. She loves school and tries really hard to do well but it also means she doesn't take risks in her learning. She doesn't not want to be wrong and that may mean not speaking up and taking the chance. Again, so me as a child. She has grown leaps and bounds in a matter of a few months. She is reading really well and according to her teacher, her abstract thinking is beyond the Kindergarten level. **mama beams**

Trey is an amazing boy and truly, he is a brilliant witty child. He is so smart. My goodness, you never know what is going to come out of that child's mouth. LOL. But man, it is really nice going into a conference and hearing, "your child is doing great, no areas to work on, no behavior issues".....with that segway, I will move on to my little man.



Trey - 2nd grade:
I have to say, this is the first year where he has actually said he really enjoys school. He teacher is exceptional. Her class is so calm and controlled and you can see the gears spinning in her students minds when you walk through the door. She has been such a blessing in Trey's eduction. This however, is the third year in a row that I have heard how Trey has a difficult time focusing and he is not finishing his work on time. He does not do well in writing workshop and has a hard time get his thoughts onto paper. Those comments are always followed with how smart he is and how well he does in Math and Science. He thrives in discussion type learning because he can vocalize his thought amazingly well. He aces spelling tests and his vocabulary is way above level.
So where do we go with that?? His teacher has talked to the site OT about him and unfortunately, because he is making progress every year he is not eligible for assistance at school. So he is struggling, but not struggling enough??? Gotta love a public education. I have made appointments with his pediatrician as well as a private OT to have him screened to see what is going on. It could be anything from ADD to sensory issues. Daniele (my cousin) is an OT and she is doing a screening for us and has also been giving me a lot of advice on refocusing strategies for him to use in class when he is feeling like he needs it. So were are working in the right direction at least. I am finally realizing that this is less of "boys will be boys" and more of we need to take care of this issue while he is young.
I am heading out here in a few minutes. I am going to see Annie with Trey's class today at the Kimo theatre. I am excited. Annie was the first real play I saw as a child. I saw it at Popejoy when I was 5 or so. I loved it (and still do). It should be fun!! If it is good I am going to take Devyn to see it sometime this weekend. I have forced the movie upon her and she has conformed, rightly so, into an Annie fan. LOL
It feels really good to be writing again. Really Good.

I'm back!!!!!

I am not sure how I let over a year go by without posting on my blog here! I still post over at LJ quite a bit. Well okay, more that I do here at least. I feel bad about my lack of blogging. I have missed out on documenting so much this last year. I feel I am finally out of the new baby/first year fog. Little Miss still doesn't sleep all night for the most part but I am not really forcing it either. She likes to nurse at night and for now, today at least, I am cool with that.

The kids have been sick with Rotovirus or the stomach flu. I took Audrey to the Urgent Care last night and thankfully she did not need an IV. She nursed a few times over night and seems to be so much better today.

Devyn was so cute yesterday morning. She had missed the 2 prior days of school and that was not good, the kid LOVES school. She came downstairs at 6 am while Dante and I were having coffee and she was fully dressed fro school, bedhead and all. LOL, she was not about to miss another day!

I do not like to have random ramble posts so I will do many more "themed" posts over the next few days to try and play catch up.

Happy First Birthday Darling Audrey!!!!!

I am not sure how it happened but it has. Audrey turned one on Sunday. **sniff, sniff**


I had grand plans of (finally) typing up my birth story and posting it on her birthday but we have had sick kiddos. Hopefully in the next few days I can get it posted. :)We had a lovely little party for her on Saturday. It was nice and small with family and a few friends. It was mellow and perfect for a first birthday. :) She loved her cake and cookies and was on a sugar high for a good 4 hours after, lol.
Happy birthday Little Miss Pipers. You have blessed our family with such joy and happiness. You are one awesome little girl.





Audrey on the news Sunday morning. :)

Her favorite toy (from our neighbor Jessica)

Her cake